Halloween has ended; Thanksgiving’s on the way. The days are shorter, and the leaves are falling off trees. This is the time of year that I pull out my sweatpants and vegge out in front of the TV.
For the past month, my life has been about work, sleep, eating, and watching TV.
And I’ve felt that something is missing. I miss me.
The real me - the person who is active, goes out and about, meditates, gets creative, and loves to be around others and chat about anything under the sun. The summer “me” has gone into hibernation, and my bear-like self has been too busy eating potato chips on the couch to notice.
But I did notice last week. I noticed my lack of energy, lack of connection. The boredom.
So, I decided to try to re-connect with that old self of mine. Trying to see if I can figure out why I feel the need to take naps most of the day and drown myself in carbohydrates.
I listened to my whole body and also my heart. What I heard surprised me and also rang true. I heard that I’m suppressing the real me with all the sleep, TV, eating, etc.; I’m trying to fill a void rather than connecting with my authentic self.
That made and still makes complete sense.
The only way to change that is to turn off the TV. Be present. And when I go to reach for a snack, ask myself: What am I really hungry for?
I heard creativity. My authentic voice. Inspiration. I saw beautiful abstract art and myself on stage acting in a play. And I felt as though I had re-connected with myself even for an instant.
What I love about listening to my heart, our authentic selves, in meditation is that our true selves tell us exactly what we need to hear, within what we can manage and what serves us best. And that’s when I realized that I can get creative…wearing sweats or not. And that’s a beautiful thing this time of year when it’s cold outside!